Crack! All Stars

2010-12-05T19:42:00.001-07:00

I wish people still used this website, instead of facebook.

The way John moves

2010-10-03T23:05:00.001-06:00

I used to like the way John moves, but that was a long time ago.

2010-07-14T22:45:00.001-06:00

No other man will ever care about the way I move better than you do it

I like the way you move

2010-07-03T08:15:00.000-06:00

I like the way you move
I like the way you move
I like the way you move
I like the way
I like the way

I like the way you move
I like the way you move
I like the way you move
I like the way
I like the way

2010-01-10T18:32:00.000-07:00

I promised never to eat this

Well

2010-01-09T10:10:00.002-07:00

I haven't in a while. But it's a new year, full of new promises. What promises have you made lately?

2010-01-08T03:44:00.000-07:00

You mean the bukkake link? I didn't know anyone came here anymore.

Goddammit John

2010-01-06T15:32:00.001-07:00

I clicked on that asian link at work.

2009-12-03T01:07:00.001-07:00

Did one of you guys write this article?

2009-11-20T22:35:00.001-07:00

If anyone needs some extra cash, HERE you go. I'll see you there.

2009-10-28T14:04:00.002-06:00

I know I sound like a broken record when I talk about how weird asians are, but this shit's getting ridiculous now WTF

Whoa

2009-10-01T15:50:00.001-06:00

This is the most ridiculous ad I have seen in a long while.

Fail

2009-08-23T10:50:00.000-06:00

Pretty hilarious: http://failblog.org/

Lordy

2009-08-04T19:26:00.000-06:00

Season two was so awesome. Also, whoever made this thingy is pretty clever.

Dang

2009-07-09T22:40:00.003-06:00

I haven't read fivethirtyeight.com in a long time, but I returned tonight and first found a bunch of poker articles that seemed like they were written by me around 4 years ago. In fact, Nate Silver's poker story sounds eerily similar to me for reasons I can't QUITE grasp (it sounds identical). But then I went on to an article about the loss of GDP due to climate change and it's just so well done I wanted to puke. It just goes to show that statistics are only as good as the people interpreting them.

Also, I shall check out this zine you speak of.

Hey there, I made a zine!

2009-07-08T07:27:00.002-06:00

Long time no speak, y'all! I made a zine that you can read for free online. But, because we're so tight, you should also order one using money. Time Warp comics will have some in soon, too, for those of you who're in Boulder.

Holler.

Summer of George!

2009-07-04T01:27:00.002-06:00

Castanza's in the top 10 at the World Series of Poker main event!

16 year olds

2009-06-03T21:58:00.001-06:00

I bet she's a tiger in the sack!

Eh? Eh?

Ear Torture

2009-05-31T10:27:00.002-06:00

Tennis is god damn ridiculous. Just watch this craziness starting at around the 2:20 mark. I mean, Seles was pretty ridic, and Sharapova screams a lot, but this is just weird.

Dood!

2009-05-17T09:58:00.002-06:00

If this is the best angry Christians have to offer, then Christianity hopefully will start a steep decline. Mockery is the second best solution? Give me a break! THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS!!!!!

LOST

2009-05-16T10:20:00.002-06:00

I don't know what I will do until Season 5. Well, actually, I'll probably just post videos like this:

Also, in response to Willie's vegan stats:

yup...

2009-05-03T12:42:00.001-06:00

That pretty much sums up Sasha and Arrow's relationship as well.

TOLERANT CAT IS BEING TOLERANT

2009-05-01T09:15:00.001-06:00

nice....

2009-04-28T11:58:00.001-06:00

excellent video Carl

MACATTACH

2009-04-28T00:08:00.000-06:00

Bonnie, I totally have an old copy of Office Mac. Does it need to be brand new?

RE: Still tasty?

2009-04-27T16:52:00.001-06:00

I want to see the machine that kills 287 chickens per second

Video of the day

2009-04-27T16:50:00.000-06:00

I Switched OVER! (to Apple)

2009-04-24T23:07:00.000-06:00

Does anyone have a copy of Microsoft Office for Mac that I could buy/use? Please?

Still tasty?

2009-04-23T21:21:00.002-06:00

Disturbing

Flashback!

2009-04-14T01:57:00.000-06:00

I Love ???

Nice post, Dice

2009-04-10T01:11:00.003-06:00

The war on atheism's magnitude is dizzying and disappointing. Wake up, people!

Can't post this on YouTube

2009-04-03T22:49:00.003-06:00

Or my grandma might see it. This family on facebook shit is outta hand. ...after watching some George Carlin I wonder if its beneficial to talk about it...but whatever. I'm on an atheist kick and this one made me laugh three times, just because Hitchens is so honest (and condescending).

WHAT IN THE LIVING FUCK IS THIS!?!?!

2009-04-02T23:39:00.000-06:00

MY BRAIN HURTS

2009-03-29T16:05:00.001-06:00

What the heck's a Barack Obama?

What

2009-03-29T14:36:00.000-06:00

What's an AIG?

2009-03-27T20:46:00.001-06:00

What celebrity would you most like to see a mugshot of? How about this

Nevermind My Last Post

2009-03-26T23:59:00.002-06:00

I hope some of you read that AIG employee's opinion piece in the NYT this week or else this link won't make much sense. Here's a perfect response to that cocksucker

What?

2009-03-26T18:25:00.000-06:00

Mother Fucking SHOW!

2009-03-26T14:18:00.000-06:00

WOOOOOOOOOOOT!

Saddest Video Ever

2009-03-24T21:35:00.002-06:00

Don't let your apples die

2009-03-20T18:52:00.001-06:00

Anyone want to go with me to that?

NIN

2009-03-20T13:22:00.001-06:00

Nine Inch Nails are playing Fiddler's Green May 26. Tickets go on sale tomorrow and are only $19 for lawn tickets. The end.

Me too!

2009-03-17T13:03:00.000-06:00

Cause I just bought a new bike and it is the SHIT.

Dude...

2009-03-16T19:49:00.000-06:00

I'm kind of wet

Chris Cornell Blows

2009-03-12T18:11:00.001-06:00

and so did soundgarden

Fuck it

2009-03-12T16:36:00.001-06:00

Bill at his best

Being Unemployed mean....

2009-03-12T16:25:00.002-06:00

Not knowing which is a bigger waste of time:
Alphabetizing the DVDs or writing letters to dead people. Good God I want a job.

FANTASY BASEBALL!!!!!

2009-03-10T09:31:00.001-06:00

Who wants in? For those who played in my fantasy football league, an invite as already been sent to your yahoo e-mail. Check that shit.

YES!!!!

2009-03-04T16:25:00.001-07:00

THIS IS GREAT!!!

Tree Man!

2009-03-02T01:50:00.002-07:00

I was watching those videos a little while ago! I love that we have followed his sad adventure to not be an episode of the X-Files anymore for free on youtube.

I wonder what kind of reception he would have gotten 800 years ago?

Happy day of birth

2009-03-01T20:46:00.001-07:00

Ani

from Dustin

Grunge Music is the best.....

2009-02-28T13:00:00.000-07:00

Why do people hate it? Really....do you?

TREE MAN.

2009-02-25T13:57:00.000-07:00

Look at him here.
Now look how he's getting better! It's so great.

It's still not far down enough.

2009-02-25T13:53:00.001-07:00

The end.

Gross.

2009-02-25T13:52:00.002-07:00

I just had to post something because every time I check and see the toothpick beard photo, I'm grossed out. It reminds me of the man with tree hands and feet. Ew.

2222 Toothpicks in a Beard

2009-02-18T19:12:00.001-07:00

Finally!

Dolphin Kissing Dog

2009-02-18T18:56:00.001-07:00

What else is there to say, really?

Their Watching!

2009-02-12T18:56:00.000-07:00

Better than Google Earth

Happy Birthday, Willie!

2009-02-10T16:56:00.001-07:00

You are a quarter of a century old today. The end.

I can't believe those people

2009-02-10T12:54:00.004-07:00

Unbiased my ass. Those captions were annoying, though. I did like the big "?" at the end.

Anyway, they'll have to pry my new religion from my cold, dead, hands.

Wowie wow wow

2009-02-09T23:58:00.002-07:00

When Stephen A. Smith, one of the primary basketball-morons on ESPN (home of the idiot reporter) is the most sane and reasonable one...there is some crazy shit goin down. (This has nothing to do with sports, btw)

Well, then

2009-02-05T15:09:00.001-07:00

A very merry un-birthday to you!

Your tax dollars at work

2009-02-05T15:08:00.003-07:00

Another victory for the Denver Office of Cultural Affairs

Internets?

2009-02-05T14:55:00.000-07:00

Today

2009-02-05T14:13:00.003-07:00

I am 26.5 years old

or 318 months

or 9540 days

or halfway to 53

or 1/3 way to 79.5

Puppy Bowl!

2009-02-01T10:50:00.002-07:00

Today is Puppy Bowl V! It starts at 1pm then plays all day long!

Oprah Oprah Oprah!

2009-01-28T10:19:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow night at Steuben's at 6:30pm. If you haven't already, send me an e-mail if you're coming. The end!

k, I don't want to talk to you about Ted anymore.

2009-01-26T17:01:00.001-07:00

I wrote you an e-mail. Read it. Also, I love John Fornander.

2009-01-26T14:23:00.001-07:00

What I mean is that Ted didn't create the sort of Christianity that New Life embodies.

No, I really don't know what you mean.

2009-01-26T09:33:00.004-07:00

I love you, John.

2009-01-26T08:33:00.001-07:00

I know, but you know what I mean.

First of all,

2009-01-25T20:59:00.001-07:00

New Life is in the wrong, too. I'm not denying it.
Also, Ted created New Life. It didn't create him.

2009-01-25T17:16:00.002-07:00

From what I've read, HBO isn't paying him anything for the show itself. They're paying him for doing a publicity tour, but it's not that much. I know he's a hypocrite, but for a religion that preaches forgiveness, I haven't seen any from New Life. New Life's been just as fucked up as Ted (paying hush money to his other partner) and they act like it's all Ted's fault. New Life is the institution that creates people like Ted.

Um

2009-01-25T16:41:00.002-07:00

I feel bad for the guy, and I also feel a lot more about the guy. I'm not saying I agree with how New Life handled things; I mostly disagree with anything New Life-associated. I don't think they had a right to tell him to leave the city, but I do think it's good they asked him resign as head pastor because he was deceiving his entire congregation and frightening them all to death about their lifestyles telling them all they should be just like him and that they should be perfect or else they have salvation issues "to work out with God on their own," while he's being a complete hypocrite.
I also don't feel bad for Ted Haggard because he's making a shit load of money and doing a publicity tour with his kids about the whole scandal. Gross. He's making a bunch of money for having fucked up a bunch of people's lives. He's a narcissist who loves the spotlight, and this is how he's getting it now. He's portraying himself as a victim, but he's been victimizing people all of his life. What goes around comes around.
I have no issues with him being gay. I actually wish he would just be gay, like he is, and quit denying it, and quit making his wife's life miserable, because she's the shit.
The end.

2009-01-25T08:59:00.002-07:00

What New Life did to the guy was really cold. I feel nothing but bad for the guy.

Can you guys believe what Lexie Grey did to McSteamy!? ZOMG!

Meth and gay prostitutes cont.

2009-01-24T22:47:00.001-07:00

Now it seems Ted had multiple gay lovers in the church! It really gets better and better every day. Ted Haggard will appear on Oprah the day before her birthday, and on Oprah's birthday, his HBO documentary premiers AND he'll be on Larry King! Even more reason to celebrate with me. The end.

Yes

2009-01-24T10:31:00.000-07:00

Yes, I would like to celebrate.

Happy birthday Oprah!

2009-01-23T21:26:00.002-07:00

Who wants to go celebrate Oprah's birthday on Thursday? I'm thinking either Steuben's in Denver or West End in Boulder depending on who enjoys celebrating Oprah's birthday. Coincidentally, Oprah and I share the same birthday. Also, I will be quitting smoking the day after Oprah's birthday, so that is also cause for celebration.

2009-01-23T15:54:00.002-07:00

Sorry, I just wanted to make some enemies today. I knew talking shit about Lost would be the easiest way to do that. I'm not gonna go through every instance of the show sucking this week. I'll just say that Hurley sucked hard, especially when he was talking to his parents. And you asked something like, "How much smarter can the show be?" The answer is The Wire.

Shut up John

2009-01-23T15:36:00.002-07:00

I think you are way off base with your critique of Lost's characters. They make a lot of sense with the sole exception of Kate. She fuckin sucks. "Say good bye, baby"!?!? Gross.

And yeah, Sawyer's "I'm doin what I always do...survivin'!" was weak as all get out, but apart from that how did the characters not seem real to you? If you mean Frogert...come on, hes a comedic piece. I dig Faraday a lot, and the sarcastic Asian dood, too...and almost everyone else they didn't kill off by now with the exception of Charlotte. Honestly, if you felt those two episodes were too stupid for you...then I don't know how smart you think TV can possibly get. Not every TV show needs to be Dexter or The Wire.

The Three Things I Hate About Lost

2009-01-23T10:59:00.002-07:00

1. I don't mind when a show's story isn't believable, but its characters should be. I feel like the writers have given zero thought to the proper response of each character when something crazy happens.

2. Whenever a plot twist or surprise occurs, they cut straight to a commercial break, and when they come back we're giving a completely unrelated scene and everything from the original scene is resolved and they don't tell us how until six episodes later (if ever).

3. While it's an intelligent show (for network TV), it still goes for the LCD a few times each episode and this is why I have to stop watching halfway through each season. I know I have to go to HBO or Showtime if I don't want my intelligence insulted.

Happy Day!

2009-01-20T11:42:00.001-07:00

Happy new president day everyone! Let's hope he makes a difference.

Lost Resumes....You are invited!

2009-01-16T09:00:00.001-07:00

On January 21st, come over to watch Lost and have a pot luck. (Bring booze or food, or both!) Be here starting @ 6:30pm. Let me know friends.....

Sometimes, when you get fired and miss the deadline for grad school...

2009-01-15T12:56:00.001-07:00

It is wonderful to listen to a song that still gives you butterflies.
(Leif Erikson- Interpol)

How is everyone else?

Finally

2009-01-14T05:22:00.001-07:00

The "blog" of "unnecessary" quotation marks

Happy Happy Birthday JOSHIE

2009-01-10T13:16:00.000-07:00

La La La! Happy Happy Happy!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

2009-01-09T23:06:00.001-07:00

JOSHUA BREMER

What incompetence has Harry Reid been up to this week?

2009-01-09T22:44:00.002-07:00

blump kin

2009-01-09T16:40:00.000-07:00

You have douchy friends on facebook, but so do I. I'm friends with Paul Ko!

Political Discourse at Its Finest

2009-01-09T14:44:00.004-07:00

A facebook friend posted a status update that annoyed me, so I responded...here at the results. Enjoy.

Justin is All ready sick of the narrow-minded naïve attitude of Obama. Money can’t fix everything nor should it.

Me: Welcome to the 21st century!

Some Guy #1: Didn't you vote for him??? I KNOW you jumped on his bus. C'mon admit it!!!

Some Guy #2: You racist... you must hate black people... and probably hispanics too. You're probably rich and just don't want poor people who don't pay taxes to begin with to have further tax cuts... or good schools... or roads that arent falling apart! :-P MONEY FIXES EVERYTHING! :-P

Some Guy #1: Money fixes boxing, and that's about all.

Some Guy #2: Apparently the sarcasm didn't seep though my message...

Some Guy #1: I'm thinking even tho we know Justin, you might want to refrain from writing "you must hate black people." but other than that, the sarcasm was understood. Justin isn't paying taxes this year, his father in law is claiming him and Carissa. BWHAHAHAHAHHAHA

Justin: Bob should if he could but he can’t so he won’t....I’m not a minority so I have to try an be poor to get money, I blame my parents for me being white.......... Yeah I hate it when them black people get all uppity and try making a better life for themselves....I once read about this guy who said "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character" but screw that lets vote for the dude because he is black.. Who cares if he have no real concept of economics or international affairs. Tell you what while we are holding down the minorities lets pay for most of there collage while we are at it…But moving away form sarcasm and going back to the point It takes real accountability and perseverance to fix the current issues in this world, not the color of some ones skin or how much money we can toss at a situation.

Next person who insinuates I’m a racist for not voting (it just ends there, that is not a fuck up)

Me: Since your rant was kinda a racist parody of racism, and because I'm willing to bet you voted for Bush, you kinda are being fairly racist. Just giving you a heads up. Btw, have you been awake during the last 8 years?

Justin: i am far from racist i am just sick of seeing the liberal left insinuating that some one color is a handicap....jude poeple on who the care not the color of there skin. we have very pround minorities in this conunty and i feel its about time for the left to quit acting likey they need hand outs...we have black people in this county that come form levels or poverty that liberals predent to understand beucase drove aroud the south or detroit then the go home to there liberal white comunities and donate some money and pat themselfs on the back... its sicking...

Me: You can take the hand outs away from the poor (aka minorities) as soon as the rich (aka whites) quit getting them. That reminds me, I have a ghetto-tour set up with my friends at East St. Louis in March. Wanna join?

Justin: As you said what I expected, now what about the poor white family? They are now less deserving because they are white? Damn that’s harsh dude screw whitty, my point is in all this mass spending there is nothing being done to remove lines of segregation and promote real equality.. is poor not poor? And it’s the left that is clearly drawing the lines that color is a handicap, and my point is no person is handicapped do to the color of there skin, thus special treatment is not deserved based on the color of your skin rather an individual or families situation. Eh cant do that liberals may lose votes and not feel as good about themselves…

Me: You are confusing me and I don't think its just your grammar. If I understand you correctly, Obama and liberals have some kind of an agenda where they give hand outs to minorities and neglect poor white people? Since when? Which program is that reflected in? Affirmative action and reparations have nothing to do with the stimulus package Obama is proposing. The stimulus only pertains to minorities in that it effects economic classes differently, and minorities make up a higher proportion of the lower class. Bringing up race at all in this discussion is what is racist.

Justin: There is our miscommunication, you’re talking about the stimulus plan I saw this ridicules but assuming conversation dwindling down in to conversation on affirmative action… I really need to get a more entertaining job so I can quit using people on face book to assume me.

Me: wut?

Justin: my point...

THE END!!!

Gawd Damn it Dustin

2009-01-07T09:07:00.001-07:00

This being on the internet while in Hawaii bullshit really needs to end. Now.

Finally!

2009-01-06T00:20:00.000-07:00

this guy can get laid

For How Cute Kim's Post was...mine is creepy,

2009-01-05T15:58:00.002-07:00

Or sexy depending upon who you are.
Super Real Life Fuck Dolls

Children

2009-01-05T14:36:00.000-07:00

marrying children.

Guess What we did?

2009-01-02T22:32:00.001-07:00

Drew and I put together a puzzle. But this is a special puzzle...it is 3-d and is the earth. We created the earth tonight, in like an hour and a half. It blew our minds.

Wooooahh

2009-01-01T23:02:00.000-07:00

Hawaii kicks ass....! Maui wow-i

That sucks.

2008-12-30T15:50:00.000-07:00

And I had a dream last night that Tom Jones was shot and killed by Britney Spears.

Bonnie Lost Her Job....

2008-12-29T22:40:00.002-07:00

Big surprise......big lay offs......but is sucks. Anyone know of an amazingly well paying job in Denver?
Happy Holidays! (Maybe being laid off is neat...who knows?)

My two favorite people I don't know

2008-12-29T15:45:00.001-07:00

are engaged.

New years plan

2008-12-29T09:57:00.001-07:00

yet?